This infatuation with you is not going away. I've tried all I can to forget you but I simply can't. You are the love of my life. I'm sending you an eCard so you'll understand how special you are to me. Click here to see your ecard
Response:
I'm sorry Remus, but it was you or the gerbil.
Monday, November 7, 2011
Business
Good Day,
I have a Business Proposal of 24,500,000.00 for you to handle with me
please reply me for more information.Contact me on my email:
sflockhart@yahoo.com.hk
Regards,
S.A Flockhart.
Response:
Sorry baby, I only handle people that I meet in person.
M A Hooker
I have a Business Proposal of 24,500,000.00 for you to handle with me
please reply me for more information.Contact me on my email:
sflockhart@yahoo.com.hk
Regards,
S.A Flockhart.
Response:
Sorry baby, I only handle people that I meet in person.
M A Hooker
Sunday, November 14, 2010
From Ellen Hubbard,
Ellen Orphanage Homes.
Dear Friend,
My name is Mrs. Ellen Hubbard, I wish to offer you a part-time job in which is of mutual benefit. I resigned from my job early last year as a research scientist for ARINI (Agricultural Research Institute of Northern Ireland) but still work part-time as a freelance consultant for the institute.My husband Mr. Dennis Hubbard and I presently reside at 4 Pasteur Gardens Edmonton London,N18 1JF England. However, due to the passion we have for children, we decided to run a humanitarian organization of saving the lives of the homeless and abandon children in order to contribute our quarter towards giving these Children's lives a meaning just as our God demanded of us to care for the homeless.
We presently have our orphanage homes in India, Somalia and Cotonou, Republic of Benin and we hope to get to other countries in time to come. We run this organization with the help of some individuals and companies who values the lives of these children and had made up their minds to send funds for their upkeeps.Most of our funding is from American friends whom we have solicited for their help and we are overwhelmed by their eagerness to send funds to us.
However we are finding it difficult receiving these funds as the bunch of the payments are in US based money orders and Checks which we find difficult to cash here in UK. To enable us receive all the donations, I wish to employ you on contract basis to be my payment representative back in the states, this way you will receive the Money Orders/Checks from our Donors, cash them easily, deduc 10% of the total amount in every payment as your commission and then send the rest back to me via Western Union wire transfer.
1. Receive Check/ Money Order payment from Clients
2. Cash Payments at your Bank
3. Deduct 10% which will be your percentage/pay on Payment processed.
4. Forward balance after deduction of percentage/pay to any of the
Offices you will be contacted to send payment to (Payment is to be forwarded either by Money Gram or Western Union Money Transfer).
HOW MUCH WILL YOU EARN?
10% from each operation! For instance: you receive 7000 USD via cheques or money orders on our behalf. You will cash the money and keep $700 (10% from $7000) for yourself! At this beginning, your commission will be 10% but willl increase as time goes on.
If you are interested in our offer, please reply directly to my Personal email address:
If you are interested with the job offer we will need you to furnish with this detailed information.
1)YOUR FULL NAMES: ................................................
2)CONTACT ADDRESS: ..................................................
3)DIRECT TELEPHONE ................................................
4)AGE & OCCUPATION:...............................................
Regards,
Mrs. Ellen Hubbard,
Ellen Orphanage Homes.
Dear Mrs. Ellen Hubbard,
How incredibly thoughtful of you to help the children. Yes, the children need our love. I myself am inclined to do such great works as what you have decided to pursue. Quite amazing indeed. Have I briefed you on what we here at American Nexus for Underappreciated Spawns do? We take the children in and give them hugs, yes. We give them meals made of love, we give them toys crafted from care. I myself had an absolutely WONDERFUL experience with a child last week.
You see, our beds here are made from the softest linens we can possibly buy, so it is quite tempting to sleep in the children's quarters. I myself find it quite an experience though. Last night I found our lost child Aaron lying in bed trying to go to sleep. Bless his heart, he was so lost and innocent-looking that I decided to climb in bed and snuggle up with some hot cocoa with him. I told him bedtime stories and I taught him about fun games with mice and gerbils.
Unfortunately I can't release my real identity, or else cops will come, raid my house, steal all my dirty magazines and then take my mice as well. I can only give you my first name--Michael. I do hope you find the proper person to take the money, dear. Have a lovely life.
Michael
Ellen Orphanage Homes.
Dear Friend,
My name is Mrs. Ellen Hubbard, I wish to offer you a part-time job in which is of mutual benefit. I resigned from my job early last year as a research scientist for ARINI (Agricultural Research Institute of Northern Ireland) but still work part-time as a freelance consultant for the institute.My husband Mr. Dennis Hubbard and I presently reside at 4 Pasteur Gardens Edmonton London,N18 1JF England. However, due to the passion we have for children, we decided to run a humanitarian organization of saving the lives of the homeless and abandon children in order to contribute our quarter towards giving these Children's lives a meaning just as our God demanded of us to care for the homeless.
We presently have our orphanage homes in India, Somalia and Cotonou, Republic of Benin and we hope to get to other countries in time to come. We run this organization with the help of some individuals and companies who values the lives of these children and had made up their minds to send funds for their upkeeps.Most of our funding is from American friends whom we have solicited for their help and we are overwhelmed by their eagerness to send funds to us.
However we are finding it difficult receiving these funds as the bunch of the payments are in US based money orders and Checks which we find difficult to cash here in UK. To enable us receive all the donations, I wish to employ you on contract basis to be my payment representative back in the states, this way you will receive the Money Orders/Checks from our Donors, cash them easily, deduc 10% of the total amount in every payment as your commission and then send the rest back to me via Western Union wire transfer.
1. Receive Check/ Money Order payment from Clients
2. Cash Payments at your Bank
3. Deduct 10% which will be your percentage/pay on Payment processed.
4. Forward balance after deduction of percentage/pay to any of the
Offices you will be contacted to send payment to (Payment is to be forwarded either by Money Gram or Western Union Money Transfer).
HOW MUCH WILL YOU EARN?
10% from each operation! For instance: you receive 7000 USD via cheques or money orders on our behalf. You will cash the money and keep $700 (10% from $7000) for yourself! At this beginning, your commission will be 10% but willl increase as time goes on.
If you are interested in our offer, please reply directly to my Personal email address:
If you are interested with the job offer we will need you to furnish with this detailed information.
1)YOUR FULL NAMES: ................................................
2)CONTACT ADDRESS: ..................................................
3)DIRECT TELEPHONE ................................................
4)AGE & OCCUPATION:...............................................
Regards,
Mrs. Ellen Hubbard,
Ellen Orphanage Homes.
Dear Mrs. Ellen Hubbard,
How incredibly thoughtful of you to help the children. Yes, the children need our love. I myself am inclined to do such great works as what you have decided to pursue. Quite amazing indeed. Have I briefed you on what we here at American Nexus for Underappreciated Spawns do? We take the children in and give them hugs, yes. We give them meals made of love, we give them toys crafted from care. I myself had an absolutely WONDERFUL experience with a child last week.
You see, our beds here are made from the softest linens we can possibly buy, so it is quite tempting to sleep in the children's quarters. I myself find it quite an experience though. Last night I found our lost child Aaron lying in bed trying to go to sleep. Bless his heart, he was so lost and innocent-looking that I decided to climb in bed and snuggle up with some hot cocoa with him. I told him bedtime stories and I taught him about fun games with mice and gerbils.
Unfortunately I can't release my real identity, or else cops will come, raid my house, steal all my dirty magazines and then take my mice as well. I can only give you my first name--Michael. I do hope you find the proper person to take the money, dear. Have a lovely life.
Michael
Friday, November 5, 2010
The Bedroom Rat Chronicles, Part Two
I venture out with my knapsack to find my lost brother, Herb. I've never gone beyond the hole and, alas, the mother is far too old to do such things anymore.
The first step beyond was tame--many bushes, trees, leaves and smaller things buzzing around me. I was quite surprised to see such life outside the hole and it actually didn't seem so horrible. The grass was cool and the shaded sun was inviting. However, it wasn't out in the wild that Herb was lost. He was inside the house.
Inside of the window.
Near the giant.
Near the...guardian.
It was difficult to climb at first, but I was able to find substantial footing in the platforms. There were slight dips, almost like little rivers running through the platforms, and they were grey in color, but not fun to step into. I hated this method of getting inside, but for years my family tried to find a way in, only to end up creating a hole merely a few steps away from the first.
When I made it inside, I could tell I was in trouble. The immediate plop to the ground set the guardian to me at once, and only by the cover of a cold block could I escape. The thing was loud and metal, and when I sat near the hinged door, I could feel a freezing breeze. It was best to stay here, especially during the daylight.
Besides, the guardian's clawed swipe could not reach me under this behemoth. It was best to come out at night, although night and day here came at such odd intervals, as if the giant itself could command the sun to rise and fall at his entry and exit. I could hear his giant footsteps echoing throughout the floors, his portal would then open, and the sun would blink on at his command--such wizardry!
I'll stay here when I think that the guardian and giant have both left. I must find Herb!
The first step beyond was tame--many bushes, trees, leaves and smaller things buzzing around me. I was quite surprised to see such life outside the hole and it actually didn't seem so horrible. The grass was cool and the shaded sun was inviting. However, it wasn't out in the wild that Herb was lost. He was inside the house.
Inside of the window.
Near the giant.
Near the...guardian.
It was difficult to climb at first, but I was able to find substantial footing in the platforms. There were slight dips, almost like little rivers running through the platforms, and they were grey in color, but not fun to step into. I hated this method of getting inside, but for years my family tried to find a way in, only to end up creating a hole merely a few steps away from the first.
When I made it inside, I could tell I was in trouble. The immediate plop to the ground set the guardian to me at once, and only by the cover of a cold block could I escape. The thing was loud and metal, and when I sat near the hinged door, I could feel a freezing breeze. It was best to stay here, especially during the daylight.
Besides, the guardian's clawed swipe could not reach me under this behemoth. It was best to come out at night, although night and day here came at such odd intervals, as if the giant itself could command the sun to rise and fall at his entry and exit. I could hear his giant footsteps echoing throughout the floors, his portal would then open, and the sun would blink on at his command--such wizardry!
I'll stay here when I think that the guardian and giant have both left. I must find Herb!
The Bedroom Rat Chronicles, Part One
It's been days now since Herb left for food. We are suffocating under this heat and I'm not sure what's taking him so long. The mother worries as well--she paces back and forth in front of our hole, looking constantly for just a sign or something from Herb. I'm afraid something may have happened, and in order to get our cheese back I've got to leave. I have to find Herb. We'll see.
Saturday, April 18, 2009
Elementary
ROBERT MUELLER III
EXECUTIVE DIRECTOR FBI
FEDERAL BUREAU OF INVESTIGATION FBI.WASHINGTON DC.
Email:fbifiles@cortado.com
FBI SEEKING TO WIRETAP INTERNET
ATTENTION:BENEFICIARY,
We believe this notification meets you in a very good present state of mind and health.
We the Federal bureau of investigation (FBI) Washington, DC in conjunction with some other
relevant Investigation Agencies here in the United states of America have recently been
informed through our Global intelligence monitoring network that you presently have a
transaction going on with the Central Bank of Nigeria (CBN) as regards to your over-due
contract payment which was fully endorsed in your favor accordingly.
It might interest you to know that we have taken out time in screening through this
project as stipulated on our protocol of operation and have finally confirmed that your
contract payment is 100% genuine and hitch free from all facet and of which you have
the lawful right to claim your fund without any further delay.Having said all this,
we will further advise that you go ahead in dealing with the Central Bank office
accordingly as we will be monitoring all their services with you as well as your
correspondence at all level.
In addendum, also be informed that we recently had a meeting with the Executive Governor
of the Central Bank of Nigeria, in the person of Prof. Chukwuma Soludo
and Mr. James Whetstine along with some of the top officials of the Ministry regarding
your case and they made us to understand that your file has been held in abase depending
on when you personally come for the claim. They also told us that the only problem they
are facing right now is that some unscrupulous element are using this project as an
avenue to scam innocent people off their hard earned money by impersonating the Executive
Governor and the Central Bank office.
We were also made to understand that a lady with name Mrs. Joan C. Bailey from OHIO has
already contacted them and also presented to them all the necessary documentations
evidencing your claim purported to have been signed personally by you prior to the
release of your contract fund valued at about US$8,000,000.00 (Eight million united
states dollars), but the Central Bank office did the wise thing by insisting on
hearing from you personally before the go ahead on wiring your fund to the Bank
informations which was forwarded to them by the above named Lady so that was the main
reason why they contacted us so as to assist them in making the investigations.
They further informed us that we should warn our dear citizens who must have been
informed of the contract payment which was awarded to them from the Central Bank of
Nigeria, to be very careful prior to this irregularities so that they don't fall victim
to this ugly circumstance. And should in case you are already dealing with anybody or
office claiming to be from the Central Bank of Nigeria, you are further advised to STOP
further contact with them in your best interest and then contact immediately the real
office of the Central Bank of Nigeria (CBN) only with the below informations accordingly:
Responded with:
Dear FBI,
Thank you. I would like to have 8 million dollars. My teacher says you guys are good
at what you do. I am to. I like to write many good stories that are like what you
write to me. I live in a house with chickens and cows and the chickens lay eggs and
we cook them and they are good. We need the 8 million dollars to be rich because my
dad went on Press Your Luck and got three whammies it is no good.
Who is this mrs bailey would she like a boyfriend I am on yahoo chat and I have an
awesome mullet. Tell her to please be my girlfriend and we need to meet on yahoo chat
i'm there all the time.
How do you say Chukwuma is that his name it is weird he needs to change his name to
something cooler like Mike I wish my name was Mike.
I think I did call the real bank of nigeria one time it was some funny number and some
guy told me to hold on the line while he got some one he called Dawn on the phone
and she sounded very pretty but she wanted to know how much money I had and I think
she would be happy if I gave her 8 million.
She went on and asked me what I wanted and I didnt know she asked me if i wanted something
called a bj and i told her that was not my name do u know what bjs are someone told me
theyre good 2 have but i dont know would 8 million be enouf for one.
Ok thank you give me a call so i can get my 8 million and my bj
stephen yung
Saturday, September 13, 2008
Large whats?
EMAIL TRANSMISSION
To: BENEFICIARY
FROM: MR.ROBERT MUELLER,
FBI DIRECTOR .
ATTN: Beneficiary,
There is an issue with the World Bank Creditors in the amount of Ј 15 Million Pounds sterling directed in cash credited to file KTU/ 9023118308/03,at the Owner of this email address which has now been reverted to the federal reserve bank of america a couple of hours ago due to the Recent Homeland Security Act which prevented large cums of money.
In view of several efforts already made by us to contact you for the following reasons based on the new account submitted to this office on your behalf.
(1) My Office desks have just received a sworn affidavit from Mr. RAINER HESSE of Germany to re-route your payment( Ј 15 M) into a new bank account number as stated "VACAP" Federal Credit Union, 1700 Robin Hood Road,Richmond, VA 23220.Account number 32501.of Mr. RAINER HESSE.
(2) Please, confirm to our department if you have instructed Mr. Rainer Hesse to appoint an attorney/agent on your behalf thereby asking that he receive cash Remittance on your behalf.
(3) It has come to our notice that you are Being contacted by unauthorized individuals with respect to your Compensation but unfortunately this office is not aware of your Unofficial dealings and warned that it is at your own risk.
(4)You are mandated to call the senior representative ( AMBASSADORZALMAY KHALIZAD ): +234-8056378827 or at this email: zalmay.khalizad.04@gmail.com via United state embassy,UN office in NIGERIA for further clarifications because your fund is now in the transfer status with Bank of America, and as soon as you call the number, you can transfer your fund to any bank account you wish.
Best Regards,
Robert S. Mueller III
Federal Bureau of Investigation
Hotline: + 1-206-426-6567
Mr. Mueller III,
Forgive me for being so forward, but this is Mr. Rainer Hesse. I was unaware you knew of my email address, although I am on those dating sites like Match.com so that's hopefully where you got it from.
I would be interested in large cums from you if that's in fact what you meant. I'm a backside boy, you see. While I'm certain the money you offer is not for me, would you be so kind to transfer it anyways to my account? I can give you large cums as well. I don't see your email address on any dating websites. Do you swing both ways? Don't tell my superiors--I'll get fired immediately. You know how it is for us gays, dodging the flak from higher-ups.
Mr. Khalizad is actually a lover of mine. Jesus, my ass still hurts from last weekend! Kindly send him a message thanking him for his services, as I'm far too shy to do it myself. Next time we'll have to play dress-up. I'll be the untrained pupil, he can be the teacher.
Would you wish to join? I've seen his collections of toys, and WOW it's like a dungeon of pleasure! There's room for three more, bring your friends. ;)
Sincerely,
Rainy
Mr. Mueller III,
Forgive me for being so forward, but this is Mr. Rainer Hesse. I was unaware you knew of my email address, although I am on those dating sites like Match.com so that's hopefully where you got it from.
I would be interested in large cums from you if that's in fact what you meant. I'm a backside boy, you see. While I'm certain the money you offer is not for me, would you be so kind to transfer it anyways to my account? I can give you large cums as well. I don't see your email address on any dating websites. Do you swing both ways? Don't tell my superiors--I'll get fired immediately. You know how it is for us gays, dodging the flak from higher-ups.
Mr. Khalizad is actually a lover of mine. Jesus, my ass still hurts from last weekend! Kindly send him a message thanking him for his services, as I'm far too shy to do it myself. Next time we'll have to play dress-up. I'll be the untrained pupil, he can be the teacher.
Would you wish to join? I've seen his collections of toys, and WOW it's like a dungeon of pleasure! There's room for three more, bring your friends. ;)
Sincerely,
Rainy
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